Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Frustration

That is the only title I can think of for this post.
It has been months since I have made a post, and I was not sure if I would ever make a new post. Everything was clicking along perfectly or as good as I could ever expect it to.
Saturday morning, March 19th started out perfect as well. Nice weather enticed me to de-winterize the lawn mower and knock down the weed tops in our yard for the first mow of the season. After I finished, I enjoyed sitting on the porch and admiring my work with the dog laying beside me. The day was perfect.
The boys came home from their activities so we decided to set up the ping pong table and play some games. The entire family was enjoying a nice Saturday afternoon. Cara was in the driveway painting her nails. The dog was exploring the yard and me and the boys were playing ping pong.
I am still not sure how it happenned, but I went for a shot that I guess I should not have. My left leg popped and I went to the ground in excrutiating pain. As I laid on the ground I tried to decide if I could get up and get in the car, but there was no way. We ended up calling an ambulance to pick me up and take me to the hospital.
The x-rays revealed that I had broken my femur just above the knee. It was a clean break, but it required surgery the next day. This was a devastating blow. We all knew what this meant. Back on crutches for several weeks.
The surgery went fine and I was discharged from the hospital that Monday afternoon. I stayed home for the rest of the week, but I returned to work the following week.
I went back to the doctor on April 1st to get the staples removed and to get x-rays to check the fracture and the newly inserted rod.
The pain has been steadily decreasing and I am getting along fine on the crutches. We went to the lake, I mowed the yard again and things are normalizing. However, there is still a significant annoyance. I frustration that I just can't get past. There is a screw close to the knee that is very large. It protrudes through the bone and close to the skin. Before the swelling went down, it just seemed like a tender spot, but now it is a noticable protrusion that is irritating to touch or brush against.
My frustrations are built up over past experience and knowing the solution. The solution is to simply remove the hardware after the bone has healed. This sounds simple enough, but there are two key factors to consider. The first factor is that it is an elective surgery and it will be costly. The second factor is that it will put me back on crutches yet again for a significant amount of time.
I guess my goal is to try to forget about this screw and go on with lift. My problem is that it causes me to realize that this is likely the result of my previous injuries and a reminder that my life will never be what I want it to be.

No matter how much I smile when I tell people this is just another bump in the road or hurdle to get past, the reality is that I am extremely frustrated with the entire situation.

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